Instructions Not Included

I have Statcounter on my blog. And a very handy little thing it is too. It lets me know all sorts of interesting things, like where you're all reading from and all sorts of other fascinating bits of data, allowing me to feel a bit like a spy. Or a stalker. Whatever's your poison, I suppose. 

One of the interesting bits of data it tells me is what search terms brought people here in the first place. Some of them are slightly more bizarre than others. For your delectation, some of the more puzzling ones include:

Man screaming in fear - erm...ok.

Really thin pancakes - those things that people call crepes when they're being poncy, but normal people call pancakes? 

Timber logs being taken away - I really have no idea how this one brought someone here.

Phillip Schofield and his little friend Gordon the Gopher - ....sure.

All human beings talk about the weather. Yes. Yes they do. And if you're in Calamity Jane you might well sing about it.

Wonder Woman is a babe.  No arguments here.

Sexy girl surfing hot underwater hd - Again, no idea with this one.

 

Cotton wool head and legs like lead - I hear you, friend. Been there. 

Scary oranges - Yes, I hear they're utterly terrifying.

And possibly my favourite -